Should You Tell Your Partner What You Discuss In Your Own Therapy?

On my Facebook page, there was a discussion about whether people tell their partners what they discuss in therapy, after I posted the below comment!  Of course, there is no law that you have to disclose what you are discussing, and for people who are discussing ambivalence about their partner …


Can Men Have A Life Outside The Family/Work? AKA Stop Caring So Much What Your Wife Thinks: Part 2.

One of my most popular pieces is here: Stop Caring So Much About What Your Wife Thinks.  I summarize the situation in many households as follows: The man starts out being scared of his wife’s rejection and/or of his decisions turning out badly, so, over time, he takes less and …


Three Types Of Risk Taking And Their Impact On Relationships

This year I built out my business, starting a group practice and a podcast in addition to my regular practice. Taking new risks in this way made me think deeply about risk in general, and the types of risk-taking that I observe in my clients.  Interestingly, risk-taking doesn’t seem to …


Men Need To Love Their Wives As Much As Women Love Their Kids

Listen to a podcast about this here! In my ongoing quest to give you a non-PC straightforward look into couples dynamics, today we are going to explore another type of relationship that I have seen be successful (here’s some other examples).  I have previously said that men should listen to …

couples counselingmarriage/monogamysex

Would Your Partner’s Peers Think They Are Lucky To Have You?

Many people act like they are being the best partner they can be, but they are really just staying inside their comfort zone. They may think they are being kind or even selfless, but if you look closely, but they are still not taking their partner’s own desires and love …

couples counselingmarriage/monogamy

Are You Overfunctioning In Your Marriage Because Intimacy Is Uncomfortable For You?

Many times women don’t feel taken care of by their partners, and I’ve written about that here and here. I’ve also addressed it in a podcast episode here.  A lot of those women are overfunctioners, which you can read about here. To sum a lot of that up, if you …


If You Have To Take Care Of Your Partner When Dating, They May Not Be Able To Care For You Or Your Child Later On

Listen to a podcast episode related to this here!  Many people are familiar with a dynamic where one partner acts as the caretaker for the other.  One example of this is The Man Child and His Long Suffering Wife.  Here is an example where the woman is the one who …


Does Your Testosterone Prevent You From Empathizing With Your Wife?

Empathy is a necessary component of healthy relationships, but sometimes, partners are wired so differently from each other that it presents a real challenge to deeply understand one another’s perspective.  One way that heterosexual couples necessarily differ from one another is testosterone levels.  Many people have no idea that this …


10 Ways To Help Your Wife Through A Miscarriage

Miscarriages are far more common than people think, because so few women speak openly about them.  This is changing somewhat, but it still remains the case that most women will only discuss a miscarriage with their closest friends, family and partner, and sometimes only the partner.  Men grieve miscarriages as …


Sex Needs To Evolve When You’re Older

Many of my clients are in their 40’s and 50’s but still trying to have sex like they are in their 30’s, and this goes poorly.  What do I mean?  By about your late 30’s or certainly mid-40’s, people’s hormones change. The same guy who could ejaculate twice a day …