Responsive Desire in Women: If You’re Never In The Mood That’s Normal

One common misconception that I help couples clear up in marital therapy is that women and men should both be turned on prior to sex.  This makes no sense if you have ever been a woman.  For women in monogamous relationships, waiting until you are turned on to even start …


You Can And Should Cheer Up Your Partner

It is very trendy to say nowadays that people are responsible for their own moods, mental health, behaviors, and so forth.  Certainly, we all have free will, but the idea that a person does not impact their partner’s emotions is nonsensical.  Stemming from this fallacy, though, is the idea that …

datingdivorce and stepfamiliesmarriage/monogamyMen

“Men Don’t Like High Achieving/Earning Women” Is Not True

Many of my clients are high achieving and high earning people.  While males in this situation consider it an obvious benefit on the dating market to be perceived as having a high powered job and disposable income, my female clients in this situation often fear that it will be held …

child psychologyelementary schoolersparentingpreschoolersteenstoddlers

Stop Overapologizing To Your Kids!

Frequent readers of this blog know that I advise you to stop letting your kids treat you like garbage, stop feeding your kids fake praise, and stop overvalidating them.  This all falls under the larger umbrella of not overparenting.  One common type of overparenting that I see is the ubiquitous …


Faking Orgasms Is A Good Way To Ruin Your Relationship

Many women think that faking orgasms, or telling their husband they enjoyed sex when they didn’t, is a good way to make him happy and doesn’t hurt anyone.  This is extremely wrong.  Every lie about your sexual satisfaction, needs, preferences, or experiences is another nail in the coffin of your …


Why Couples Don’t Share Love And Care Sexual Fantasies With Each Other And How To Change That

Many sex therapists and couples counselors, as well as magazines like Cosmo (not knocking Cosmo, the sex instructional manual for me and my friends in the 2000’s), advise couples to tell each other their fantasies in order to be closer and spice up their sex life.  Yet, so few people …


Your Husband Can Show The Vulnerability You Want… But It Starts In Bed

Many women are frustrated and sad about their husband’s lack of vulnerability and emotionality, as well as his dismissiveness.  A common dynamic in this situation is what I term Mr. Perfect And His Crazy Wife.  This is when man always acts like everything is fine, he’s great at coping with …


When You Finally Feel Bad For Your Younger Self

Many clients come into therapy struggling with an epiphany: they finally are able to look back on their younger self and feel sad and angry on behalf of this self.  While this indicates a lot of progress in self-growth and self-compassion, people often don’t know what to do with the …


Are You Overworking Because Of Financial Goals That Are No Longer Meaningful To You?

I work with many high achieving clients whose income levels fall into the highest percentiles.  Yet, many of them are still not happy with their lives.  It is essential to deeply reckon with why you are working so hard. If you don’t have concrete ways to transform that wealth into …

couples counselingmarriage/monogamysex

Sex Life Problems Indicate Relationship Problems

Couples often believe that sex is a completely different area from the rest of the relationship.  Unfortunately, not only is this untrue, but this perspective can be harmful to relationships.  Sex is just another type of connection, and the same issues that are evident in a couple’s intimate life are …